FU Facebook

Felix Ungar. Whose roommate just died. But that’s not what you were thinking.

No – you were thinking about something completely different. Probably because you use facebook and every time you do that’s what you immediately think.

It’s not because facebook is a nameless, faceless, soulless machine inexorably devouring the world’s spare time by endlessly creating new apps.

And it’s not because facebook lets you get used to something and then makes you crazy by completely changing it.

And it’s not because facebook created “timeline” and then randomly and unilaterally and against our wills switched users, one by one, to the new system, each of us screaming NOOOOOOOOOOO in furious futility.

And it’s not because facebook is changing humanity into creatures who spend all their time with 45,607 friends they’ve never met.

And it’s not because facebook has no customer service department and no way to contact it in any way, shape or form to express any sentiments of any nature.

Nope. It’s the “like” button.

No matter what the circumstances, Facebook won’t let me love, loathe, disagree, dislike, detest, sympathize or remain undecided. Death in the family? “Like.” Lost your job? “Like.” Broken arm? “Like.” Armageddon? “Like.”

It’s almost enough to make me want to complain to customer service. Oh, wait …

Posted on December 26, 2012, in Commentary, Humor, oddities. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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