Hot off the presses is the latest edition (October 24, 2011) of that lefty liberal rag, Newsweek. I pull it from the mailbox. (Disclaimer: it’s not really a box. It’s an open metal basket and the bizzarro squirrels in my neighborhood hide walnuts in it. Fortunately I like squirrels. Braised, boiled, or stewed. Served with a nice glass of shiraz.)
The Ack-Ack begins when I page through the magazine and find an interview with Robert Bork. Remember him? “Failed Supreme Court nominee“? Who “facilitated Richard Nixon’s Saturday Night Massacre“? Yup. That Bork. The man who “denounced [the 1964] civil rights bill that would require businesses to serve blacks” but who says (with a straight face) that he is “now perfectly happy with the way things turned out” because the U.S. has successfully transitioned to “a nondiscriminatory society.” I’m sure people of color all across the nation would agree.
(By this time I’m in full Ack-Ack mode. Going “Ack! Ack!” after every sentence.)
And women of all colors will be thrilled to learn that the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment shouldn’t apply to them. “Yeah. Women are a majority of the population now. They aren’t discriminated against anymore.”
It’s so reassuring to know that we’re not being discriminated against when a male manager asks during a job interview if I plan on getting pregnant or if I have children and what will I do when they get sick or requires female employees to follow a schedule like this: “Mini-skirt Monday,” “Tube-top Tuesday,” “Wet T-shirt Wednesday,” “No bra Thursday” and “Bikini top Friday.
When Bork was nominated, Senator Edward Kennedy spoke with chilling foresight: “Robert Bork’s America is a land in which women would be forced into back-alley abortions, blacks would sit at segregated lunch counters, rogue police could break down citizens’ doors in midnight raids, schoolchildren could not be taught about evolution, writers and artists could be censored at the whim of government.”
Sounds exactly like what the Republicans are doing today.
And this is Mitt Romney’s new top legal adviser. Ack! Ack!